Star Wars spoofs
by krazieevilmoron
Summary: Mostly just filler, written as though a script. Actually me and my friend acted this thing out. Wow...we need lives... lol
1. Revenge of the Yoda

Star Wars: Episode Alpha

Revenge of the Yoda!

Yoda; Ah… good bath that was. Yeeeees. 

Dark Yoda; (Jumps in front) BZZZZZZZZZZ Oh! Jedi Master Yoda, you are. BZZZZZ (lightsaber shuts off)

Yoda; Evil Twin, are you!

Yoda; Meheheheh. Wait- acting like Yoda, you are! Twin brother, you must be! Then- Sith, you MUST be!

Dark Yoda; No! Jedi Knight, am I!

Yoda; Sith!

Dark Yoda; Jedi!

Yoda; SITH!

Dark Yoda: Sith Lord, I used to be. But Jedi Knight I am, now. Converted, I have.

Yoda; No! Sith Lord you are!

Dark Yoda: Used to be, I was. But, my paycheck, Darth Sidius forgot.

Yoda; Understandable, that is. Meheheheh!

(In Background: A miniscule Jedi fights a giant Sith)

Both; Chuckles Size matters not!

Yoda; Jinx! A Soda, do you owe! Meheheheh!

Dark Yoda; Bu- Blast!

Yoda; Meheheheh. Wait- acting like Yoda, you are! Twin brother, you must be! Then- Sith, you MUST be!

Dark Yoda; No! Jedi Knight, am I!

Yoda; Sith!

Dark Yoda; Jedi!

Yoda; SITH!

Dark Yoda; Look! Sith Lord there is!

Yoda; A Sith Lord? Where he be?

Dark Yoda; (Pulls out gun) BANG

Yoda; AHHHHHKK!

Dark Yoda; Meheheheh! Slain my better half, I have. Now, drink his blood I shall! EH- (pokes body) Never mind. Skin too tough and hairy! But, Lightsaber will I take! Meheheheh!

Krazieevilmoron; (Walks in) Hey, this is Star Wars! You can't get any guns!

Dark Yoda; Erm… BANG

Krazieevilmoron; Ahhhhhhk!

Dark Yoda; Meheheheh-

Jedi Padawan; BZZZZZZZ (Lightsaber activates)

Dark Yoda; Ah! A Jedi Padawan, you are. Die, you must! For seen too much, you have.

Jedi Padawan; You've killed Master Yoda! And one of the producers! He was green and ugly and hairy, but he was still a Master! You must pay!

Dark Yoda; Stepped on Yoda, you have. Meheheheh.

Jedi Padawan; WHAT? Ah… (Kicks body into grass) Much better.

Dark Yoda; Meheheheh… Now- Dual, we must! BZZZZZZZZZ (lightsaber activates)

(Battle scene)

Dark Yoda; MEH! (hits Padawans' lightsaber out of his hand)

Jedi Padawan; Uh… (runs into grass and picks up a light-) haHA! BZZ-

Dark Yoda; A Lightbutter knife, it is! Meheheheh!

Jedi Padawan; No matter!

(Battle Scene)

Dark Yoda; A HA! (throws lightsaber) VMVMVMVMVMVMVMVMVMVMVMVM…etc

Jedi Padawan; That's a really long saber throw!

Dark Yoda; Meheheheh! Much force power, do I have. Helpful, it is.

VMVMVMVMVMVMVVMMMVMMVVTTTT! (Lightsaber returns, cutting through Dark Yoda and Jedi Padawans' armpit)

Dark Yoda; Ahhhhhhk! Too much force power, do I have.

Jedi Padawan; Umm… (Moves around to back of Dark Yoda and quietly stabs him in the back with a Lightbutter knife)

Dark Yoda; Ahhhhhhk! (Drops)

Jedi Padawan; (moves behind the corpse and picks up Lightsaber) I win! (raises arms) Ill just leave now. (Walks over to hill) (Trips over rock and falls over whats really a cliff!) I should have my own theme son- ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhggggggggghhhhhhkkkkkkk...

Mysterious Voice: Meheheheh! 


	2. Wrestling Filler

Star Wars- Episode Beta

Special Delivery

Grievous; "Ah! Time for some Professional Wrestling." _Bzt_ (Flicks on TV)

Crowd Noises

Grievous: "No! Use the blaster! Why aren't you using the blaster? Damn it he's gonna beat

you! USE THE BLASTER! Yea! Get him right under there! Blaster! BLASTER-" _Ding-Dong_

Jedi Padawan; "Hi, uh, im a Jedi Padawan earning his allowance. I have a pizza here for a

Mister Grievous? Anchovies, double cheese…"

Grievous; "Shut up and hand it over." (Swipes the pizza)

Jedi Padawan; "Hey, can I have a tip?"

Grievous; "A tip? AHAHAH!" _SHHHHHHH_ (Slams door onto Padawans foot)

Jedi Padawan: "_AHHHHHHK!_ MY TOE!"

Grievous; "Meheheheh! Now, back to my Crusher match…"

Jedi Padawan; "I need my tip!" _BZZZZZZZZT_ (Lightsaber activates) (Padawan begins melting door)

"Hehe!" _BAM_ (kicks down door)

Grievous; "Ahahaha- what? Why you- that door was a specially made! …Hey, do you want to

see some wrestling? I got pizza!"

Jedi Padawan; "Pro wrestling? Sure! And the pizza sounds great!"

Grievous; "Good." (Sits on couch)

Jedi Padawan; "Oh, this pizza is delicious! Hey- HEY! USE THE BLASTER! These wrestling

types,

they never know when to use the damned blaster, eh?"

Grievous; "I know, they just- Gah. Not like its illegal or anything to have one in your belt."

Jedi Padawan; "Yea!"

Both; (thinking) "Wait…it IS illegal!" _Begin Whistling inconspicuously_

Jedi Padawan; "Hey, I won't need my allowance now I'm eating with a Sith Lord! Oh, you

know that

pro wrestling is fake right?"

Grievous; "What? WHAT? FAKE? LIES! LIES!" _BZTBZTBZTBZTBZT_ (Begins shooting blaster

everywhere)

Jedi Padawan; "Oh my gosh! WHAT ARE YOU- _AHHHHHHHK!_" (Shot with blaster)

Jedi Master; (Walks in) "Oh no! You killed my Padawan? Well then, you must pay!"

_BZZZZZZZZZ_ (Lightsaber activates)

Greivous: "Aw, crap."

Jedi Master: "DIEE- hey, wrestling!"

Grievous: ..._BZT_ (shoots Jedi Master)

Jedi Master: "Blaster! BLASTER, YOU PIECE OF SHI-" (looks at gaping, yawning chasm in

chest) "Wow. I didn't even notice. Heh." (Dies)

Grievous: "Eh. 0.0! WRESTLING! Punch! PUNCH! BLASTER! USE THE BLASTER! MOTHER FU-"

(Door explodes inwards and smashes T.V. Set)

Police: (Or w/e the hell they're called) "Take off your belt and remove the blaster!"

Grievous: "Ehh…Crap. Um…To hell with this. (Drops belt)

Police: "AWW! OH MY-OH GOD! OH MY GOOD- JESUS KRINGLE! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT! OH MY GOD! AAAAAAAAAAARRKKKKHHHHHH…(Screams trail off to gurgles)

Grievous: "Eheheheh… (shoots holes calmly into them as they cower against his back wall trying hopelessly to escape)

(A/N: Wow that was just filler. This is going nowhere! Yay! If anyone thinks this is funny,

though, then I'll keep going...or ill try to.)


End file.
